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The School of Etiquette

Wedding Etiquette Tips


[Some of these tips can also extend to wedding planners]

As with most etiquette, wedding etiquette can be very subjective depending on the cultural background of the couple/ families. Nevertheless, here are some helpful tips that are still vey relevant:


  1. Can we ask for a monetary gift?

Although this is becoming a popular trend and in most cases can be very practical for the couple, it is not proper etiquette.

It may be more tactful to ask your guests to contribute to something like your honeymoon, rather than asking your guest to give you money.

  1. Can I uninvited a guest?

It is considered disrespectful to un-invite a guest, even if all you have done is verbally inform them. Couples should make sure that they can accommodate all of the people they want to invite before sending out the invitations.

In the instance of an unresolved issue that has arisen after you have sent an invite to a particular person, it is best for that person to decline their attendance to your wedding, rather than you uninviting them.

  1. Do I have to invite someone who invited me to his or her wedding?

No. You are not obliged to invite someone just because they invited you to their wedding. Your circumstances and expectations for your wedding may vary from theirs. In addition, relationships and people change with time and you may not be on the same relational terms as you used to be with that person.

  1. Can I invite some kids and not others?

This can be a tricky area and you could end up upsetting some of your guests. However, most people still expect to see children of close/ immediate family members i.e. nieces, nephews, even if children of your guests are not invited.

Nevertheless, if you are stating that no children are allowed on your invites, with the exception of children within your families, it is best to strictly adhere to this rule and not make an exception for certain guests.

  1. Do I have to give a plus one to my guests?

You are not obliged to give a plus one invitation to any of your guests. However, please bare in mind that you are generally expected to extend an additional invite to your guests who are in committed relationships or are married.

  1. Should I send thank you cards to guests that did not give me a gift?

You have up to 3 months after the wedding to thank your guests for their presence at your wedding, whether or not they have gifted you.

  1. Should I invite my boss and/or colleagues?

This is really down your personal preference and although it would be a nice gesture especially if you have developed a close relationship with them, you do not have to.


Finally, enjoy your special day and remember that etiquette in this context is not really about set rules, but about your hospitality and making everyone including yourselves feel comfortable.

If you found these tips useful, then feel free to sign up to our free community where you will get up-to-date etiquette related information and advice. You can also read our previous blog post on ‘How to be a perfect wedding guest’ by clicking here.

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